that time i gave my doctor an edible

For like two years, I had been telling the doctor all about my supper club and the special treats they make. This time, I finally remembered to bring the doctor a gift.  

After this appointment, I asked the receptionist for an envelope and a notepad. I wrote a short note, put 2 caramels inside, and put the doctor's name on the front of the envelope. 

The Next Day

Doctor comes into the office. Sees the envelope on the desk. Opens it. Does not read the note. Eats both caramels ON AN EMPTY STOMACH. 

Doctor starts seeing patients. 

Doctor starts feeling a little off. 

Doctor asks the staff for yesterday's patient list. Sees my name. Doctor goes back to the office, FINALLY READS THE NOTE and sees my initials. Doctor immediately knows that they are fucked. 

😬😬😂😂😂

Doctor calls an audible to the staff. Asks the staff to cancel the rest of the day's patients and leaves work early with a "stomachache."

Six Months Later

I'm back for a check-up. Doctor and I are catching up. Doctor says "you know you dosed me last time you were here.” I'm completely confused. Doctor tells me the story, "I was on the train back home questioning my whole life. Looking at my hands like, 'these hands are no good'"

I am crying. Whew, I'm just glad my Doctor made it home safely 😩😩

"Doc, you ate BOTH on an empty stomach?!?! We talked about this! Didn't you read my note?"

"Yes," Doc says sheepishly. "After, I ate the caramels" 

"Next time, Doc, I'll write in big bold letters: NSF W" 

We had a good laugh.

THE END